Friday, 10 February 2012

Post 12: Where 1984 Isn't Coming True




SPECIAL NOTE: Given that Sinclair Lewis was born in 1885, and Mussolini, the figure most associated with Fascism didn't come to prominence until at least 1919, I think it's safe to say this quote is about a century off. This is a minor nitpick, but those desperate to uncover the "truth" about politics might lead by example, and take the three seconds necessary to uncover the truth about their own quotations.

Let's start off with something we probably all know, but too often are willing to forget. Fascism was real. There were Fascist governments, Fascist armies, Fascist secret police forces and, by the millions, Fascist victims, those who were beaten, jailed, and very often killed by forces too powerful to even try to stop. It was the great scourge of the 20th century. The same is true of Communist regimes, and of theocratic ones. Right wing or left, religious or atheist, dictators have, and do, dominate large parts of the world. They have done so for millenia, they might very well continue to do so, though, thankfully, trends in the last fifty years suggest they may be on the decline.

I would imagine none of this to be a great surprise to any reader, who may wonder what the point of such a lengthy opening memento might be. You're right. Here it is: You can do those victims of dictatorship no greater disservice than to equate your suffering to theirs, and that's precisely what posters like this try to do. "People were rounded off and sent to concentration camps? I feel you man - Ron Paul wasn't invited to the Fox News debates. Fascists are everywhere." "Forced collectivization in the Soviet Union? Rough business. Sounds to me of Obamacare." What could be more insulting to victims of autocracy that, despite everything we know about their atrocities, all the education and testimony and direct evidence we have about how truly cruel these regimes were, there's still a compulsive need among a great many of us to make it about ourselves (going much further in this direction might risk some overlap with Samuel's most recent post - which, interesting and provocative, can be found directly below -, but don't forget we're still partially in preamble mode here).

>This problem isn't a universal one. Godwin's Law, and more recently the First World Problems meme has done a lot to spoof this attitude, but even they can't do the job (my own Law says that as a conversation, online or no, goes longer, the likelihood of any topic being broached approaches one) or worse, becomes a tool of those who don't really get it ("Whining about homework? What a First World Problem. Let's talk about some real concerns... like Harper being a Nazi.")

Whenever the topic of dictatorship coming to America (or Canada, or Western Europe, or wherever else it won't happen) arises, George Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four is inevitably brought up. I'm not personally a fan, but it would be pretty stupid to try to deny the book it's status as one of the most important of the last century, and, while far from the first dystopian work, the one against which all others have and will be judged. Its extremely vivid depiction of how totalitarian government could control every aspect of its citizen's lives hit most of its readers particularly hard, and for the last sixty years almost every sentence has been parsed, deconstructed, and hotly debated by every totem on the pole, from top tier academics and literary critics to seventh graders, many of whom act like they're its first readers. For these men and women, Nineteen Eighty-Four is no longer a fiction or even an allegory, it's a both predictor and descriptor of the future. The first world will turn out like this they say. Every new bit of legislation brings us closer and closer to Orwell's vision, which is entirely accurate. It is my assertion, as no doubt you've guessed, that this is far from the case. As I see it, the publication of this book virtually guaranteed it would never, at least in the first world, become a reality. Because of how iconic things like "Big Brother" or "NewSpeak" have become, as a population we've become so overcautious about their possibly coming true we've almost eliminated the chance they ever will. But this is only the beginning of where this book's devotees go wrong.

>For starters, there's not much evidence that this was, as Orwell saw it, a prediction of things to come. In fact, most evidence seems to suggest it was instead a satire of pre-existing totalitarian regimes, especially the Soviet Union, with little sprinkles of World War II-era Great Britain, where censorship and rationing was at a relative high. Rather like Animal Farm, his other main claim to literary fame, Orwell is doing what he, and all satirists are famous for, exaggerating the worst of what already exists in order to make fun of it. Defenders of Nineteen Eighty-Four-as-prophecy might then question my attempt to guess Orwell's motivations, or instead point out that just because the author has a certain attitude toward his own work, does not mean that it's the correct one. To some extent I agree (I may even write another post just to deal with the topic), this point I made may be tenuous. But I would also say that the side that has tenuous evidence is always preferable to the side that has none.

More important than how Orwell looked at his work, or what inspired it, is the question of how accurate he was. I can think of one example in particular in which he was very wrong. I mentioned NewSpeak earlier. In the novel, the government, in an attempt to stifle the free speech of its citizens, create NewSpeak, an increasingly simplified form of the English language. The party reasons that, by banning certain words, its citizens will be unable to express certain concepts. But this is absurd. Orwell seems to be under the impression that words determine thoughts (a strong version of what's known as the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis; the Wikipedia link can be found at the bottom of the article), a once popular theory long since debunked and tossed aside by linguists. But it doesn't take much linguistic training to see how silly the concept really is. Look at euphemisms: When coloured became considered offensive, people started saying negro. When that became offensive, the term became black. When that became (to some) offensive, we started saying African-American. At no point did banning the word coloured (or negro, or black) restrict anybody's concept or ability to express the idea behind the word. We just came up with new ones. That one aspect of the book, no matter how crucial, is inaccurate is not in itself a total damning of its credibility, and I hate to give the impression of short changing you out of a fuller analysis, but in the interest of both not taking up reams of space, and staying on point (we're not going to become a dictatorship), I should start to think about calling it quits.

The writing of this post made me think about the general direction this blog is heading in and it seems that we've made our theme overreaction, or, more specifically, how best to avoid or rectify it. This wasn't really intentional, although perhaps it was unavoidable given our stated purpose (a place to put especially long rebuttals to statuses our friends posted). Needless to say, I feel I should close on the same note our other posts have all, in one form or another, have: With a sincere request we chill the fuck out. There are no ghosts in the attic, no monsters under the bed, and no spectres in our government.

PS: For those interested in learning more about the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linguistic_relativity

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

Post 11: Wherein The World Is Really Really Cool



Samuel here.

You guys! Little-known fact, you guys: hating the world is not a passport to Coolsville. I know plenty of people who will tell you at great length that humans are fucked up and society sucks, but I personally believe that the world houses some pretty rad dudes. Let's explore this at length!

So we fucked up everything, huh? We fucked up everything. Well, what are you reading right now? I'm no one important. I just woke up this morning and decided that I had some things to say. It took me about two hours to write something that anybody in any place at any time can just sit down and read. Basically forever.
Where are you? Because I'm in my room. I'm alone. I'm not talking to anyone. You could be in Bangladesh. It is strictly irrelevant. We can still communicate just as easily.
This thing that you're reading my post with, what else can it do? Just take half a second to think about that. Until 100 years ago, just two human generations, anything you were seeing was actually in front of you. Until 150 years ago, three human generations, anything you were hearing was right there with you. Until 5,000 years ago, maybe 170 human generations, anything you were learning was from someone who was literally right beside you. For tens of millions of years of human history (depending on what you consider to be human), you could only experience things in your immediate vicinity. In our grandparents' lifetime that permanently changed. We are no longer restricted by time and place. It doesn't matter to us. It's that simple.

Go to a window. Look up. Since you're on the internet, and are therefore only awake at night, I'm going to assume you can see the moon. Take a good look at it. People have been there. People have been there! That is incomprehensible.

Much of the world still lives in the Middle Ages. We have the capital to lift them out of it. But that has changed tremendously, and increasingly rapidly, in the past 50 years, and almost every political scientist and economist will tell you that it's going to keep happening and it's going to happen faster.

We have traversed the Earth and we have ascended into space just to make sure we didn't miss anything, and now I can sit at home with a $200 computer and a free copy of Google Earth and I can literally see any part of any piece of land on Earth. I can take sightseeing tours through Madrid for free without leaving my room, and anything I could possibly want to know about Madrid's history or politics or architecture is instantly available to me on Wikipedia. And if I want to actually go to Madrid, how do I get there? I fly. It takes me a couple hours.

Literacy. Medicine. Plumbing. I could literally write fifty pages about how mind-bogglingly better things are than they used to be. I am thoroughly, firmly, unshakeably convinced that we have created for ourselves an awe-inspiring, free, and functional world. I think that the vast majority of the people I know are very good people, and I think that the vast majority of people alive are, too.

I lead an indescribably good life. Nothing truly bad has ever happened to me. I have never had a sibling or a close friend die. That's ridiculously new in the timespan of human history. I have never caught polio or scrofula or the bubonic plague. I was born with severe myopia, but it couldn't matter less; I happen to have been one of the maybe 0.000001% of history's myopic humans who has access to corrective glasses. It doesn't even begin to affect my quality of life. The kings and the queens of history would kill to enjoy the quality of education, health care, or transportation that I do. They would be floored to encounter the ease with which I can communicate with anyone in the entire world. What does it say about our society that any reasonably intelligent person with a decent work ethic can, within a couple decades of their birth, learn something substantial about the universe that literally nobody in human history has ever known before? Ever met someone with a PhD? I bet you have. One of the most dominant institutions in our society, the institution of higher education, is designed to enable ordinary people to figure out things that literally no one in the history of the human race has ever figured out before. That is completely new to the last generation. It is pretty much unique to the last fifty years.

Even our political structure is fucking awesome. You hate politicians, right? Well, get a life, dingus. Do you know how remarkable it is to have freedom of speech? To have literally no meaningful fear whatsoever of police officers spontaneously arresting and torturing you, to be able to choose your career for yourself and to live your life with a person you love, to have finally freed yourself from the shackles of institutionalized racism is something tremendously remarkable. Mitt Romney doesn't excite you? Barack Obama turned his back on you by not horsewhipping senators into not fillibustering? Stephen Harper is...Stephen Harper seems kind of mean? What absurdly petty complaints! You're getting handed a briefcase full of money and you're complaining that the bills are folded wrong. The fact that you even know what Barack Obama is doing on any given day should be more than enough reason not to whine so much.

How about the morning after pill? How about abortion? 1966 is the hallmark year in the history of women's liberation. Sex, whether rape or consensual, no longer has to change your life forever. That is the most empowering thing I can imagine. And it just happened. It just happened.

Look, I get that some things suck. I'm the first to tell you --- and I have at great length, in previous posts --- that poverty today is more widespread and more preventable and more despicable than I can possibly describe, let alone conceive of. I am deathly afraid of nuclear weapons; I cannot believe that everyone who will ever get their hands on them will fear their own destruction more than they wish for the destruction of others. I am frightened by epidemics, I am frightened by decreasing biodiversity, I am frightened by those who insist that birth control is more wicked than the systemic disempowerment of women. But how long have these been problems? 40 years? 50 years? 70 years? Not even the blink of an eye. We're in a race against the clock, but it's really not the first time. And what happens if the worst should happen? What are we losing? Nothing except what we've built ourselves. If we fucked everything up, why does it even matter if we lose it all? And what have we fucked up other than the stuff that could make us lose it all? It's a self-defeating argument: "nothing we have is worth having because it threatens what we have". Listen to yourself, cartoon! Everything meaningful that we are risking is relegated to this planet, and is our responsibility. At worst, all we risk is undoing our work. We fucked everything up? Give me a break.

As Louis C. K. says, "everything's awesome, and nobody's happy". It's one of the most important messages I have ever heard from anyone. I live in a democracy where I befriend whomever I want. I love my fellow humans and I can tell them anywhere at any time. I have never met a human who does not work for the good of the human race, and I doubt that you have, either. Time and time again, we confront our demons, and time and time again it is our angels that prevail. What Earthly reason could I have to want to devolve? I am the blessed member of a blessed species. And anyone who thinks otherwise can respond in the comments section with their impossibly common near-infinite-distance instantaneous communications device.

At the risk of blunting the message, I would like to add an unrelated post script: please do leave a comment. We write these for other people to read, so the more comments we get, the happier we are. And if you leave a comment giving us advice (longer, shorter, post about this dumb thing on my news feed), the better we will understand what people want from us. And anyone who knows me understands that disagreeing with me is an excellent way to make me write unreasonable amounts of stuff, which is always great fun. So commenting can only ever be a win-win situation.

Other important Post-Script note: I will not be updating next Wednesday. I have a math midterm that day and a physics midterm two days after, so I will be doing super important stuff that night (drowning my sorrows). However, the next week is reading week, so I'll update at least twice then. Until then, keep on trucking.

Saturday, 4 February 2012

Post 9: Wherein There Is Exciting News

Samuel here.

So, it is possible that you've noticed that there was no scheduled update yesterday. Sorry for not giving you notice on that, but we would like to gloss over this fact with some exciting news:

Simon and I were finding the two updates a week thing a bit prohibitive in terms of time commitment, especially since we are now entering the midterm season and the real crunch time in terms of assignments. Believe it or not, it does take a reasonable amount of time to put these posts together, and we felt that in the long run it simply would not be sustainable. So we offered Mr. Ian Martin an exciting package ("write for us and Philippe will argue with you!"), and we are pleased to announce that he will be taking over the Sunday evening time slot. He is a good writer and a humorous individual, and he gets as angry about things on Facebook as the next guy, so he makes a welcome addition to the team.

This need not mean the end of collaborative blog posts, though; if people want us to, I imagine we can work something out so that the three of us can collaborate on posts in the future. But you would have to express an interest in that, because we sure aren't running this blog for our own amusement. Well, okay, we are running this blog for our own amusement. But you're important to us, too!

Also, in general, thanks for reading. We are getting substantially more page views (and comments) than I think either of us expected we would be getting 2 weeks in, and that's awesome. So, thanks!

Wednesday, 1 February 2012

Post 8: Wherein finally SPACE



Samuel here.

First thing is first! Simon and I keep noticing a very large spike in pageviews on midnight on the days when we update. That is SUPER gratifying, because it means that people are actually hanging around the site when it is supposed to update. What it also means is that we can't slack off and upload, say, 58 minutes late because we slept for 2 hours last night and had to start and finish 2 problem sets today around an ordinary day of classes. So rest assured that that sort of thing doesn't happen around here! No, sir! Also, I'm sorry. Now, on to the meaty stuff.

Did you know I like space? I like space! So when Newt Gingrich recently announced he wanted a base on the moon by 2020, I got pretty excited. I have spent much of the past week fantasizing about Newt Gingrich's space policy winning him a landslide victory in Florida, forcing Romney and Obama to both adopt daring plans to spend lots and lots of money on stuff I think is cool. While I'm not exactly holding out for that, I would like to discuss why I think Gingrich wanting a moon colony is super awesome. The person who wrote this status didn't exactly give me a lot of meaty opposition to sink my teeth into, so I get to be a bit freer with my structure this time around. But I will address the comments at the end.

I'm not going to discuss in this article why I think that space exploration and colonization are necessary, because I simply don't have enough time or space; I am essentially building my life around that philosophy, so I would like to give it a little more room than a weekly blog post allows for. So, for the sake of this post, let me take the axiom that space exploration and colonization are both desirable.
                                                                                                             
Anyone who thinks that space policy is the most important aspect of this election should be out campaigning for Newt Gingrich right now. Every other candidate's space policy sucks. Throughout this whole Republican primary, everyone but Gingrich has consistently brushed off questions about NASA by making irrelevant statements about government funding or about really, really caring about the middle class. Newt Gingrich has always taken a hard line in favour of government-led exploration and colonization of space. That impresses me a great deal. I acknowledge that his motives are different from mine; Gingrich wants to see increased space exploration because he wants to feel that America Is Great Again. But space exploration is a very, very tough line to sell. People see it as a waste of tax dollars and a waste of resources, as too abstract and complex a concept to be worth their attention. But it's very easy to sell "the Chinese are going to win". So if you can sell it that way, you sell it that way. No one disparages the moon landing for being the epitome of Cold War tensions, and we wouldn't disparage a moon base if it was the product of a bunch of old white guys being afraid of Chinese people. For such is the nature of democracy.

            "Hold on", you say, "slow down! We must immediately know why Newt Gingrich is the best candidate on space policy!"
            Good! Let's talk Republicans.
Herman Cain probably put the second-most thought into space policy. He wanted to de-fund NASA, and instead provide incentives to private corporations. But that doesn't make any sense at all. If his objection is to the government directly employing space systems engineers, he has to understand that pumping as much money into the private sector will employ just as many engineers. If he wants to cut spending, just cut the NASA budget (please don't cut the NASA budget!). If he wants nationalistic space innovation, obviously it's better for NASA to be an organ of the government. What suddenly defunding NASA would do is to take all of the people who know everything about space travel, destroy the structure within which they operate, and scatter them about the world. We would see a massive spike in space disasters from upstart companies that simply didn't have the expertise to launch craft, we would see a whole lot of way too risky business plans that would flop and take taxpayer dollars with them, and worst of all I'm not convinced we would ever see any exploration or colonization again. There is no profit incentive in exploration or research. No private company would ever have launched the Hubble Space Telescope or the International Space Station. SpaceX sure isn't going to pay to house a woman on Mars. Private companies simply perform a very different function than government-mandated ones. NASA exists for far-seeing presidents to tell the world that they want a man on the moon and they're going to get it before the end of the decade. Boeing does not take orders from the president, and it shouldn't have to.

Mitt Romney has been relentlessly jabbing at Newt Gingrich for the idea of having a moonbase by the year 2020. He claims that such elaborate schemes would be to the detriment of the U.S. economy. I am fundamentally confused by that idea. Firstly, well over $500,000,000,000 is spent annually on the American military, and the recent post-Iraq cuts of $23,000,000,000 by the Obama administration --- with the consent and encouragement of the highest ranking officers --- shows that that budget is malleable. I do not buy the argument that America lacks the funds to launch at least a barebones attempt at colonization. Secondly, where does he imagine those funds are going? The government isn't going to outsource space R&D to Kazakhstan. Newt Gingrich knew what he was doing when he announced bold plans for space just before the Florida primary. NASA cuts cost jobs in Cape Canaveral. NASA grants make jobs in Cape Canaveral. It's as simple as that. Now, I know the Republicans aren't generally the biggest proponents of Keynes, but Gingrich had no trouble playing that tune on the space coast when he made his announcement. Once again, Mitt Romney is taking the easy way out.

Rick Santorum seemingly has no opinions about space. That's like having no opinion about dinosaurs. It's like thinking that love is "pretty okay". It's like going for a walk alone late at night and all you can think about is arithmetic. I can only surmise that Rick Santorum is made of cardboard.

Ron Paul, of course, would de-fund everything. That goes against the axiom that I arbitrarily selected, so sucks to be Ron Paul in this analysis.

And I will ignore Michele Bachmann and John Huntsman and whoever else may at one point have been running, because they certainly were not memorable for their space policy.

I am also going to ignore Barack Obama for the time being, in the hopes that his space policy develops over the course of the general election. I don't like to compare actions to words, so I would like to wait to hear from him again about this first. If the Democratic party line doesn't change, though, please tune in for more whining. But let me say this, for now: I want the manned space program back.

So why do I like what Newt Gingrich has to say? Well, honestly, I don't really like it. But it's way better than most people would have you think it is. Firstly, there are few humans alive today who would not agree that the landing on the moon was one of the greatest moments in the history of our species. Let us not forget that that was, if you'll excuse the expression, totally just a shot in the dark. There was absolutely no reason for Kennedy to believe that it would be possible to place men on the moon by 1970. And yet, with sufficient political willpower and a shitload of money, they accomplished it.

Unlike the second commenter on the status, I have no trouble believing that a similar fiscal and political push would get us a permanent colony on the moon by 2020. The first commenter suggests a concrete platform, but that would require either bringing concrete there (and mixing it along the way?), or synthesizing, pouring, and moulding concrete on the moon, which is absurd at best (sorry to harp on this, but I once lost a space design contest to someone who suggested exactly that for a Mars colony). No, we easily have the technology to build a moonbase, and I have seen it myself. Basically, you just send some of these rovers to the moon and have them flatten out a spot of ground. Then you can stably land craft there. Inflate some places to live and all the rest is for the biologists to figure out. For those of you who think that the political molasses is too strong for us to fund colonization projects within our lifetime, I would like to direct you to Project Horizon and more generally to this Wikipedia article. Is it night? Are the skies clear? If so, walk outside and look up. And then you will truly understand why we can and will summon the political courage to branch out into space.

"That's all fine and dandy", you say, unaware that nobody actually speaks like that, "but there are still huge engineering problems with colonizing the moon!" Yup. Watch. We'll fix them. We always do.

"But how does that justify campaigning on that platform? We want our politicians to have vision, but not to be impractical." This is usually true. But I don't see anything wrong with wanting to do something really, really worthwhile that you aren't sure you'll be able to do. The only problem with impracticality in politics is if it could be damaging; removing social security or Medicare, for instance, is impractical. By all means, if we're making people suffer because we're colonizing the moon, then we're monsters (moonsters?). But there is absolutely no reason that Gingrich should have to hurt people in order to get to the moon.

I think that the third commenter perfectly sums up everything that was wrong with the public reaction to Gingrich's suggestion (the youtube link is a link to circus music). This is the most courageous thing I have seen anyone do in this election cycle so far, and Newt Gingrich should be applauded for trying to sell something that he believes in. I can only hope the Democratic Party picks up their tremendous slack, and --- this is hard for me to write --- follows in the footsteps of Newton Leroy Gingrich.

P.S. I'm not going to touch all that stuff he said about lunar statehood. What a nutbar.

Keep on trucking.

Sunday, 29 January 2012

Post 7: More Rabble Rousing Gibberish


Simon and Samuel here.

This is a picture that we are largely sympathetic to. The first post on this blog was a massive rant against libertarianism, and this picture appeals to our lily-livered commie sensibilities. But we think that it misses the mark in several very crucial ways. Libertarianism is a sensible ideal with very broad support, and arguments against it should reflect that. This picture does not. We are tremendously sympathetic to the plight of the poor, and please don’t forget that as you read this post. It’s just that you cannot defeat poverty without understanding why it exists, and you cannot vanquish dangerous ideals without thinking through your arguments.

For starters, this picture misses the meaning of the word enterprise. I’m not sure how much more can be said about this. It’s an admirable thing, working day in and out with the goal of feeding your family. But it isn’t enterprise. Almost more importantly, no one has ever claimed that enterprise - or the much more ambiguous statement of “hard work” - will lead, or even should lead to wealth. Under a purely capitalistic worldview (the kind we imagine Mr. Monbiot is speaking for), your work will only lead to prosperity if it’s the kind of work people are willing to pay you for. Trying to self-sustain doesn’t qualify. We understand what Monbiot is saying - these women break their backs (we shudder to use the word “slave”) on a daily basis, and need help. But his approach, just like the Assange-Zuckerberg comparison from last week, is a cheap way of putting it. A picture of two women, tired, sweating, and uncomfortable, is sad. It is not a debate.

But it’s also irrelevant. We have never heard anyone claim that wealth is the inevitable result of hard work and enterprise. Poverty in much of Africa is the complex result of a lack of infrastructure (roads, policemen, hospitals), the withholding of financial aid by corrupt governments, and an inability to coordinate sales or trading across much of the countryside --- and that is without even mentioning the lasting institutional horrors introduced by colonialism. No one ever says that African women are poor because they are lazy. That argument, which was the primary criticism used against the #Occupy movement, is always used against American youth in American cities. Why is that an important distinction? Because America has infrastructure. America has roads and policemen and hospitals. America’s government does not withhold money from the people, and if they do then they can be fired and replaced. The internet, cell phones, and highways make it exceptionally easy to coordinate sales across rural America, while its government and its institutions are its own by choice. The argument then would be that any American who is poor is poor of their own volition. We might not agree with that, but there is a genuine debate to be had there, and how you answer that question pretty much decides whether you are or are not an economic libertarian. But if you ask the question about Africa, no one is going to say that the women of Botswana are poor because they choose to be so. No one says that girls of Namibia are too lazy. This picture doesn’t address any meaningful school of thought.

What could it have done for us to agree with it? Easy. It could have shown a fifteen year old Mexican migrant worker in California, picking oranges after dark for $2.5 an hour. That would have been a powerful image with a powerful message. Instead, we get a totally off-the-mark piece of pathos to counter an argument that doesn’t actually exist - an all too common tactic of the soundbite school of debate. What a wasted opportunity.

But, once again, we would like to end with an impassioned plea. If any of you aren't into charity, we don't imagine we'll convince you in a few brief paragraphs. Thankfully, one of the greatest philosophers alive today wrote a pretty damn compelling book about it. For those who donate to charity, we would like to direct you to this wonderful website. Don't like charity? Disagree with anything we've said? Leave a comment!

As always, stay cool and keep on trucking.

Friday, 27 January 2012

Post 6: On the Nature of Awards


Just like with Samuel's most recent post, the status here is largely a pretext for a broader discussion; namely, the role of film - and particularly Academy - awards and ceremonies, both in the industry and among viewers. Is it hackneyed to write about the Oscars in Oscar season? 100 percent. Not even going to try and make an excuse. As an aside, I realize that starting with a status and then immediately moving on to a much broader topic isn't something we should make a habit of - this is after all the News Feed fact check, but this is still week one, and footing needs to be found. Besides, 50/50 was a mediocre schmaltz-fest, and there's only so much you can say about those.

Award ceremonies never fully satisfies anyone who watches. They disapprove of the nominees. They disapprove of the winners. They disapprove of the clothes. This is as true of the Best Actress Oscar as it is the Nobel peace Prize. The only real reason people seem to watch these broadcasts is to find an excuse to be angry.* No one, for instance, ever loses an Oscar. They were robbed. There was politicking. Bribes. It's bordering on lunacy to assume a group of six thousand independent voters came to a different conclusion about a subjective topic than you did. There had to be some kind of treachery. It's an understandable phenomenon. Getting angry is one of the most fun things a person can do, and if the anger is self-righteous? Hoo daddy! That's the kind of high that'll keep you going to the grave. More than that, unlike a jerk professor of unhelpful cab driver, your Oscar complaints are universally understood. Even if they don't reach buff or fanatic levels, everybody loves the movies. They're among our culture's biggest shared experiences. When you tell your friends your opinion on the results, they all know what you're talking about. It's gratifying. I shouldn't try to seem like I'm passing judgment on the people who get wrapped up in awards - I definitely fall victim to it myself. For example, a win for George Clooney - the dictionary definition of "mediocre" - this year over the great performances from Brad Pitt, Jean Dujardin, and especially Gary Oldman (I'm not immune to the clutches of fandom) will put me into a rage. I'll post angry Facebook statuses and punch my pillow and hold my breath until I turn blue. I know it's preposterous. I also know it's inescapable. (Of course, a win for Oldman would make me giddy for as much as days to come. The sensation does undeniably run both ways)

* This is no longer entirely true. The popularity of Ricky Gervais as Golden Globe MC, especially last year, has led to agroup of people saying they watch the ceremony for the host. This is usually accompanied with the same superior sneer people have when telling you they see the Superbowl, "but only for the commercials."

But other than on the night itself, do the Oscars have an impact? Have they ever? Well certainly in the industry they do. As far as the good people of Hollywood are concerned, the Oscars are a major career boost, distributors and studio chiefs going to absurd lengths to boost their hordes (the Weinstein brothers, Harvey especially, may be the best known example of this). And they can be. The main reason I'm happy when someone I admire wins is for just this season. If an actor, a win almost guarantees better roles in the future (a notable and tragic exception to this is F. Murray Abraham, who had a few quick years of stardom and then very quickly faded away). If a writer or director, their future projects have a bigger chance of getting made. This is a big deal, especially for as self-congraulatory an event as an awards show. But as for the importance they have on the average viewer, I have to say I'm skeptical. I don't mean on the night itself, that we've looked at already. But outside that. Think of your favorite actor / director / whoever. Do you know how many Oscars they have? If so, was that a factor in coming to like them? Can you even remember the last time you were told "Let's see / rent that one - it won an Oscar!" I certainly haven't. Not from myself, my friends, my parents. Not even from the video store clerks. A movie may be marketed as "award winning," but very rarely consumed as such. So unless I'm mistaken, other than the ceremony itself, this is a serious emperor's new clothes situation.

Speaking of awards - and here I guess I seriously undercut my attempts to seem above it all - I feel I have to digress to mention that the BAFTAs, the United Kingdom's own film academy, has chosen to give this years lifetime achievement award to John Hurt. This (2012) is Hurt's fiftieth year in the movies, and for most of that time has been one of the most consistently top notch actors, as well as one of the most prolific (about 175 films, if imdb is to be trusted). Last year alone he appeared four - the final Harry Potter, Immortals, Melancholia, and Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (out now in Empire theatres everywhere!) - a diverse enough group to ensure most cinema goers saw him at least once (though those of us in the know made sure we saw every one). Harry Potter probably will end up being his widest exposure, but he really has, particularly in the 70s, broken a lot of ground. Quentin Crisp in The Naked Civil Servant (1975), one of the first sympathetic portrayals of a gay man on screen. Caligula in I, Claudius (1976), the high point of what was already the high point of television. Kane in Alien (1979), the focus of one of the most memorable scenes in film history, and wouldn't dream of ruining for you. The title role in The Elephant Man (1980). I could go on and on and on, we haven't even touched on most of my favorites. John Hurt is not my favorite actor, but in terms the importance and flair he brought to his industry, he's undoubtedly the most deserving candidate.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNXcl-AE8TA <- Here is a brief, recent clip of Hurt promoting a play he was in. Just listen to that voice.

Stay cool,
Simon

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Post 5: Wherein I Remember It Isn't All About Politics OR Why I Hate Gamers But I Don't Hate You



Samuel here.

I'll record this some day etc.

Don't let the picture fool you! Writing a post about Magic: The Gathering is the last thing I want to do. Instead, I want to talk about gamer culture, and more specifically, what it is about gamers that makes us do things like post rude comments about games on Facebook photos.

This is a picture of a card that they are seeing for the first time, and it is being posted by a third party retailer to inform people that this card is coming out soon. It's important to note that this card is definitely going to be sold soon; thousands of copies of it have been printed already and are currently sitting in warehouses waiting to be shipped to stores. And yet, these people complain. The first commenter seems to be deeply invested in the general quality of cards, writing that it is their "disappointment of the set", as though they were really hoping that this specific card would be awesome. And not only did the second poster agree with them, but 9 people liked it. And the next two posters thought that we desperately needed to know how much they wished the art could have been used on a better card. As if just looking at this card is so revolting to them that they simply cannot appreciate the picture.

So why do we do this? Why do gamers have this compulsion to vomit their opinions at the world? I will let you in on a terrible secret: gamers are horrible, horrible people. Let me share with you an anecdote: there's a store in Ottawa that holds regular competitive Magic events, and I haven't regularly gone there in 3 years. Last month, I thought I would peek my head in and play for an evening. When you arrive at such an event, you are expected to sign up by the time it is scheduled to start, or else the event will commence without you. If you're late to sign up, it's generally accepted that you have to just suck it up and wait until the next week. When I went to this event, however, there was a kid, maybe ten years old, who had tried to sign up on time but the event software had failed to correctly process his transaction, and so he was not registered for the event (despite having already paid for it). As we sat down and got prepared to start the event, he brought it to the attention of the staff, who announced to everyone that we would have to wait for about five minutes for him to register the kid. And with a 10 year old kid talking to a staffer at the front of the store, literally 5 or 6 men, probably between the ages of 25 and 50, all became outraged that they would have to wait for 5 minutes. "If he didn't sign up on time, it's his fault. He has to learn a lesson". "Too bad". "He can play next week."

Even worse, this sort of thing is relatively common, especially online. I know tons of awesome gamers, many of them among my very best friends, but when you're playing games, the people you notice are the really obnoxious ones. I have spent much of my life doing really fun things with really terrible people. Here's what really frustrates me: gaming culture scares away players, and yet games are so much more fun when more people play them. Better strategies will be developed faster, more people will be more skilled at the game and so it's harder to rise to the top, and there's a higher chance you'll bump into someone in real life who plays the game and can talk with you about it. But bigotry and obnoxiousness are the best way to make our community steadily worse.

And yet, I play games. Games are fun. They make me think harder than just about anything else. And they have very tangible payoffs; often I win money, often just respect, but either way it is great to consistently win at something. And now that video gaming truly is an industry, with dozens of genres of games, being really good at a game is increasingly accessible to everybody. Are you bad at video games? No, you aren't. Seriously. I can believe that you're bad at first person shooters, I can believe that you're bad at racing games, but have you tried independent aerial combat puzzle solvers? Probably not.

So this is where you come in. Often when I play games, I am playing with misogynists, with racists, with sore winners and sore losers. I play with grown men who throw tantrums when asked to wait 5 minutes. I don't like that. I hate it. Games deserve better. So here is my plea to you: pick up a game. Whoever you are. Find a cheap one that you enjoy, maybe talk to a friend of yours who plays games, and just play it until you're done. It really is a universal joy. Everyone likes playing games. If enough people who don't hate women start playing the games I like, then I won't have to put up with bigots any longer. And if reasonable people start playing the games I like then maybe they will see that in limited, 2R for shock in a metagame that has a 1-damage and 3-damage red spell and a whole ton of really conditional removal isn't terrible when that shock also has a flashback. And isn't that a dream worth clinging to?

P.S. Ian Martin tied me up in his basement and improved this blog until I couldn't take it any more. Please visit http://communistgoblin.com/ or he will beat me. Which, depending on what you think of Julian Assange, may or may not be a good thing.

EDIT (March 28, 2012): I've played with this card a lot now, and, exactly as I suspected, this piece of versatile hyper-value removal is really, really good. Everyone who was whining about it is bad at magic.